dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
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