He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
