Whoa Z and x make the same sound
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
My feet surprised me
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
