i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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