sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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