i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
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