Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
