Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
