he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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