You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
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Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
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The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
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