I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
