I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
