I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Send help, water and tortillas.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
