Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
