The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize