Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize