that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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