i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
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