You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
im drinking this country out of the recession.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
