how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
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