did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Randomize
