All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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