Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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