After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
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