So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
