Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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