Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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