I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I think people are normalizing furries
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
