It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
