The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Still dying that you shit outside
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Randomize
