White coat. Heels.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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