Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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