Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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