but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
