Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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