why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
