How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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