Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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