can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Randomize