Soap is not a condiment
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Is it penis luge time yet?
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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