maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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