found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
