aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
