I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize