Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
