I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
