Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize