How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
