Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
love makes seman taste better
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Randomize
