You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize